Twig By Twig

Patrick and I decided to buy a house in the summer of 2009.  The actual purchase of our house occurred in the spring of 2011 (have I mentioned our tendency to make simple things unnecessarily difficult?)  When we moved in I started a list of things I wanted to do.  It had 29 things on it.  It currently has 43.  So we are making progress, just not the good kind.

I would describe my relationship with home related projects as extremely bi-polar.  So much so, that if there was a homeownership mental hospital Patrick would have me committed.  I have "depressed" times where I don't really feel like lifting a finger...and so I don't.  Annnnnd, so...nothing gets done. Don't misunderstand me, I am not depressed during these times (more like lazy) but the house just might be.  And then I have "manic" times where I have six million things I want to do and Ineedtogetitalldonerightnow.

Probably in no small part due to the fact that I am studying Proverbs 31, I am currently in a manic state.  Contrary to what you might think, I firmly believe that Patrick likes me (if not the house) better in the depressed state.  That is because manically motivated Kelsey's projects go a little something like this:

• I get an idea.  Usually this occurs at a really busy time when we already have zero time in our schedules.

• I excitedly tell Patrick about this idea.

• Patrick tries to act excited, while dreading the inevitable outcome and contemplating how much this will cost.

• I obtain the paint/L brackets/joint compound/pavers/2x2/wallpaper steamer/whatever other materials needed to do said project.

• I get home from the store and immediately get started on the project, completely neglecting whatever else might need to be done at the moment (dinner, changing a diaper, etc.) and also completely neglecting to plan out the project at all.

• 10 minutes into the project, I am either bored or frustrated with my lack of planning from 10 minutes earlier, since now it is (somehow always surprisingly) not going well.

• Patrick stops by to put his (typically completely logical) 2 cents in.  I get mad...can't he see that this is my project????

• 15 minutes into the project, I stop.  I leave everything out however, because I will clearly go back to it to finish.

• I start another project, this one will obviously be faster and turn out better (cycle starts again here).

• 6-10 days later, Patrick finishes the original project.

• I tell Patrick that I wanted some minute detail a different way and he must change it or I will never be happy again.

• I take credit for the project (it was my idea).

Let's see this in action with some real life examples, shall we?

Before

Our loft:  When we moved in, I wanted to paint an accent wall and hang lots of vacation photos.  One week before I hosted a wedding shower, I decided to start.  Two days later (after ordering all the photos, buying all the frames, taping off the edges and getting the paint) I discover I am pregnant.  Patrick tells me to give it up, nobody cares if the loft's not painted.  What?!?!?!?

After

I ignore him and start cutting in with the paint (with a mask on), only to discover that being on a ladder is making me lightheaded.  And now the bottom half of the wall is red around the edges.  Patrick finishes painting, and my mom assists hanging the photos.

Before

 Our laundry room:  Patrick comes home from work about 10 days after I had our son to find that I have stripped 2 sheets of wallpaper off the walls and then decided to take a nap.  What else would I be doing on maternity leave????  Oh yeah, taking care of a baby.  Patrick strips the rest of the top wallpaper and border, and meticulously adds a white chair rail to hide the seam of the bottom wallpaper.  After the chair rail is up, I decide I want it to be black, not white.  He gets right on that...

After

Our landscaping:  I decide that I want to put a little retaining wall in around a flower bed.  I watch a thorough YouTube video on it, and declare that I can do this myself.  I weed the bed and make a trip to Menards.  But I didn't measure anything and apparently the guys working in the garden center are not intimately familiar with the dimensions of my backyard.  We make a second trip and finally purchase our materials.  Patrick decides to step in and be responsible and look up in our Suby's owners' manual to see how much weight we can haul.  Whoops. Patrick makes a third trip for the rest of the blocks.  I insist that I will dig the trench out this week (ha!).  This puts us solidly in the 6-10 day waiting period.  I assume Patrick will get started on this soon.  

Won't a flower bed look awesome here??

Well what are you waiting for, an invitation??

The list could go on and on.  And on.  So what have I been working on this week instead of the retaining wall?  Distressing this window, of course.  It is currently sitting in the backyard, waiting its 6-10 days before Patrick decides to finish painting it and puts the faux stained glass in its pane.  I mean, before I decide to paint it.  And I will, just as soon as the acid dye I ordered gets here and I finish dyeing my son's wool pants...